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Showing posts from April, 2019

Back in Black

In the spirit of Actually Getting Things Done I have blitzed through two whole tasks in the garden by failing to do them properly first time around. Or compromising if you're one of those relentlessly optimistic characters. I’ve decided to go on holiday at some point and can’t face coming back to the land of giant tree pile and rubbish. So I’m making it look tidier by moving things from place to another basically. And hopefully reducing giant tree pile to ashes. Literally. I may have been assisted in my fervour by a plate of carbs in the form of crab mac and cheese* and plan to continue this method until my garden looks like a garden again and not a refuge for hoarders. Other victims of my faux enthusiasm aside from my pancreas were my good sweatpants (so called because they were soft) and my black hoodie. I may have also worried about blood poisoning from rusty wires (thankfully my tetanus is up to date), spiders crawling on me and the noise my tarp wall was making annoying t

The Fine Art of Not Doing Very Much

When it comes to gardening, I seem to have perfected the art of time travel. I go outside and into the Tardis. 2 hours later I come back out having not accomplished very much. If my gardening life was a movie it would be Dr Who Does Groundhog Day. I go out, I battle roots, hit myself in the face with various types of shrubbery, break garden tools and generally wreak havoc instead of progress. Take yesterday for example. Or the day before, or last Tuesday, really doesn’t matter. The only difference was the addition of music to yesterday’s repertoire. Turns out headphones and spades don’t mix. And the lack of progress may also correlate to the number of dancing breaks… The intention was to clear the area of ground for the storage and compost heap. What actually happened was: Irrational dislike to ivy plant and a half an hour battle to remove said ivy plant. Metallica didn’t help but it was finally vanquished with the assistance of Powerwolf. Said hello to the beetle I saw